The Third 12-Year Cycle.

 Happy Birthday Jon.

ThanksFIFA

What a year it has been son. Compared to our annual discourses on the status of the world and the human condition over the years. 

2026 is the year of the fire horse- your Chinese horoscope was the metal horse. which makes you 36 this year while Zoran Mamdani make 35. I'm sure you're aware of Zoran, who is of your ilk, won the hearts of New Yorkers, was elected mayor of the cultural center of the free world last year, he took office January this year. It was an exhilarating change of political personalities for mayor in long beleaguered New York City when Mamdani and his crew swept over the city with creative, innovative even outlandish notions of promoting, governing and sustaining a city of 8.5 million people, the largest in the US. New York has twice the population of LA, the second largest city in the US. 

NYC is significant in this year's birthday post because, apart from the fact that your siblings are living and working there, the 2026 FIFA World Cup was co-hosted by Canada, US and Mexico amidst an ongoing war in Iran. The finals between Argentina and Spain was played in NY's New Jersey's Met Life Stadium accommodating over 80,000 spectators on July 21 where finally, in a controversy stained world cup, football won instead of politics and racism, when Spain beat an all-white, racist Argentinian team who put on an utterly disappointing performance as defending champions. Argentina had 0 shots at goal, Spain had 11 and scored one at extra time to lift the World Cup.

In addition Argentina showed their ugly side during and right after the match resorting to assaulting Spanish players who were celebrating their victory. This behaviour was evident to billions of global spectators via telecast during and after the finals. Somehow I could picture you there son. Being the football fanatic that you are and the lover of life and all things nice, you'd have probably made the world your playground and your workshop, with no one really knowing where you were physically on any given day. Pretty much like how you're existing now. An international man of mystery, a hero with a thousand faces. Like I said; Pretty much like how you exist now.

Continuing our conversation from last July/August. If you recall I said three things; 1. that the people of the world is currently at it's most peaceful, comfortable and technologically innovative. 2. But things could get worse or 3. it could get really bad. 

Guess what Jon?

It has gotten really bad and it could get worse. 

It was only in 2024, right smack on your day, the 26th of July that the Paris 2024 Olympics was held to great fanfare and style, and things were just 'coming up roses' but fast forward 2 years, 2026 is a disaster waiting to get worse. 

War broke out on 28 Feb, when the US and Israel decided to bomb Iran. It was a botched war hastily  planned after the US successfully invaded a defenceless Venezuela for its oil and kidnapped President Maduro & his wife in the process. Drunk from the arrogance of this swift victory, they thought invading Iran and demanding regime change would be as quick and easy, but it wasn't and now the US is in a quagmire on day 163 of the war and counting. The world is tethering on a precipice between world war 3 and the control of the Strait of Hormuz. As I see it the US/Israel have lost the self-inflicted war on Iran and is trying to make a clumsy exit by shooting whatever's left of their diminished missiles stockpile. Imagine an old drunk, badly beaten-up blond cowboy, being kicked out of a saloon while shooting his guns to empty. The entire saloon watches and laughs. I feel sorry for Donald Trump but I am also grateful to him for the fact that he showed me and those who care to see, many truths about geo-politics, the culture and the true nature of the leaders of the nations implicated in this conflict.

 

First China; thanks to Trump and his tariffs and sanctions, China found new resolve to overcome those limitations through sheer will and hard work, called Accelerationism. Fast tracking progress with hard work at scale made the Chinese stronger morally, intellectually and technologically bringing China close to, if not on par with the US and even surpassing the yanks is EV and battery tech. 

Admittedly it is rather inspiring to be witness to such achievements in real time as a Chinese. Especially when China's AI and chip technologies leap frogged the US in record time and at a fraction of the cost. 

Second the Iranians. a civilizational race like the Ethiopians, Chinese and Hindus. embraced a single continuous language, Parsi and Zoroastrianism, their religion as Persians. Today they are devoted Shia Islam believers as a direct lineage to the Prophet via his son-in-law Imam Ali right down to the ayatollahs who head the theocracy today. These people have demonstrated the sheer power of unshakable faith in their religion applying humane practice of protecting the weak and downtrodden. Iran has been almost a solitary voice and supporter of the Palestinians' struggle as well as other marginalised nations in the middle east namely; Lebanon- Hezbollah : Iran's closest and most capable partner of Shia faith and militia since 1980s. Yemen -Houthis (Ansar Allah), Iraq - Shia militias, and Palestinian Hamas in Gaza (Sunni) despite sectarian differences. This is too much information I know but such has my admiration grown for a people outside of my race and region. 

Not enough is said about the magnanimity and sanity of the Iranian/Persian people. They are a clear example of how civilisational adults or 'grown-ups' responsibly behave in a world gone mad. The Iranians have not made any foreign invasion since 1856. However they have been building their defences against outside invasion for decades retaliating only when attacked and when they are forced to defend themselves using missiles and drones, they first issue warnings to their targets to beware and to evacuate civilians from their target zones, which are mostly military installations and not human habitats. In contrast, American & Israeli missiles attacks have killed hundreds of children, teachers and staff in schools and hospitals in Iran. This here is really what did it for me. Their deep humanity and love for life. The world can now see who the godless and the god fearing are. 

On the personal and family front, it has been a year of reckoning from the start. On January 14, your Pek Kong, my big brother Johnny passed away peacefully at home, he was 79. Although he had been frail and unwell, the news came as a shock to all of us as he was our indestructible big brother, uncle, father and clown at times. I especially took it hard as he has been my older brother for as long as I can remember through thick and thin. I wrote him a farewell essay exactly a week after his funeral > The Secret of Life...

It was also at Johnny's wake and funeral that I got to see and experience the 'gifts' my brother bestow us. 

I finally got to see and talk to your brother and my ex-wife, after seven years. It was akin to a man wandering the desert and finally seeing an oasis after seven years of mirages. 

How was it. You ask? It felt like Odysseus reuniting with Telemachus and Penelope briefly only to realise that he'd lost them entirely. The subsequent supper meeting with Zane at Ali Maju late one night sort of confirmed it and suggested it could be a last one. 

Precisely at that point it dawned on me that 'the road home' is still long and yet uncertain (cue Odysseus). Perhaps the most obvious fact is that forgiveness has yet to be considered the final act of self preservation to quell the anger that only serves to hurt the ones holding on to it. I can understand forgiveness as a path toward freedom. I cannot demand that anyone else walk it.

Odysseus spent 10 years fighting the Trojan war and another 10 finding his way home. Homer had a cruel sense of humour when he plunged Odysseus into all manner of trials and tribulations for 10 more years before he allowed him to be re-united with his wife & son. Perhaps this is the reason why the Odyssey is arguably one of the popular and most told stories in the ancient and modern world. Everyone is on a personal quest, or a journey to go home. Wherever 'home' is. 

In other words, I see it as a search for meaning. The pursuit of happiness is trumped by the pursuit of meaning. What is happiness if life is meaningless? I also wrote a piece on this here > Odyssey

Yes Jon, of course it's easier to say all these things when I am not the victim but the perpetrator of the misdeed in the first place. I am not trying to gloss things over or make light of what was done, but from the very onset, I have been trying to make sense of this life to 'truly live' or to allow life to live through me so that I can get to understand what and how this life works, in making decisions, making mistakes and making amends. I had briefly regained physical contact, only to realise I might have lost the possibility of a family relationship. Perhaps I'm talking about a relationship surviving separation.

Many have been hurt by my actions but take consolation in the fact that people who suffer most are those who commit wrongful deeds and are condemned to live in shame and remorse for the rest of their days. That is for sure... until we each find meaning and purpose for this life. 

Memories beyond the open window- PineForestAI

However, strange as it may seem, I have subconsciously worked or willed myself into this stage of my life. A life of solitude. A pilgrimage as a passage in one's life to uncover who I really am. The more I stay the course and walk the middle path, the more I find some justification and reckoning for my existence in a world of impermanence. No matter how courageous or hideous our deeds, they were only dependant on conditions arising and then passing away. What we do or don't do exists in the gaps in between.

Good or bad, cruel or kind, family is what we return to in this big, beautiful and ephemeral world. Finding the way home may mean to an earthly family or a cosmic one. 

Home is where we're all heading, while on the way, let's find a way enjoy the journey while it lasts, together or otherwise. I find liberation and comfort dwelling in the fact that; death can end a life but not a relationship. 

Just like the one I have with you. 

At the end, it all fades away (to white or black) quite like the Tornatore classic; Cinema Paradiso, shot to Morricone's original soundtrack. Point is; Life is all too short. Really short. And even; no matter how bad or wonderful the situation we're facing right now, it will pass.

So on your birthday and this post on your departure day, farewell son. 

See you again soon.

I love you. ee cummings

 Depth & Death in One Sentence. A Poem.

l

(al

ea

fa

ll

s)

on

el

in

es

s.

l(a leaf falls)oneliness. 

The layout of ee cumming's shortest poem is presented as such. Vertically descending. 

Though the shortest poem, it probably evokes the most amount of discourse, discussions, dissections and definitions. 

Obsessed with using letters in lower case, including his name, ee cummings laid use of letters (and parenthesis's) putting them to great utility in the arrangement for optimum effect in serving the idea and the message/s intended.

What is the meaning of this one-sentenced poem? Best described as, a falling leaf interrupting the word loneliness after the first letter lowercase 'l'. To read l()oneliness

For me, it's a diss on the word 'loneliness' metamorphosing the word to 'oneliness' when we realise that a person's life, best represented by a single leaf that one day must fall to the ground. So to feel lonely is to miss the point that it is in our 'oneliness' or oneness with the all that completes the whole. 

We are never alone in this cosmos, we are always in oneness with it. 

And once we come to this realisation, we no longer wallow in loneliness but unite in 'Oneliness' with the cosmos.  

Loneliness comes when all our days are spent in self-centredness. 

The very activity of self-centredness produces loneliness.

It is narrowing the whole vast extraordinariness of life into one small 'me'.

Amen. 

I love you. In Memoriam

Death Ends A Life But Not A Relationship

Here I would like to honour the people who are dear to me and have gone before me;

In Memoriam. September 2022. 

• Grandfather and Grandmothers (Ah Kong, Ah Mah, Sar Mah)

• Mother (Mama)

• Step-Mother (Abu)

• Father (Papa)

• Son (Jon)

• Father and Mother in law (Kung Kung and Po Po)

• Elder Sister (Ah Chi)

• Dato' Douglas Lee

• Queen Elizabeth II 

 

Coat of Arms of Queen Elizabeth II

The recent demise of the Queen at age 96 saw the end of an epoch, of the past. 

Her funeral became the most watched event in television history. 

Never was silence and stillness observed for such long drawn periods amongst the people present during the procession of the Queen's coffin whether drawn on a gun-carriage by young naval officers or by horsepower to Windsor.

As much as people understand that die we all must, and that in this case there is even cause for celebration, anyone living past the big nine-O deserves a standing ovation. But as the moments and days go by from her demise, there remains another kind of mourning. Perhaps not a mourning but a feeling of a sense of loss of more than just a monarch or an extraordinary human being but the loss of values -  propriety, family, dogs, horses, duty, honesty, simplicity, discipline, sacrifice, selflessness, leadership, understanding, womanhood and love. 

One could argue that she lacks the last value but she loves everyone equally, starting from the inner family circle, outer family, community, the government, and the nation including the commonwealth. She mustn't be seen to have favourites and she wasn't. 

Which was clearly demonstrated in the case of Princess Margaret, her dearest only baby sister. 

She and Margaret when very young, made a promise to their father King George VI to never let anything or anyone come between them. When Margaret wanted her permission to marry the love of her life; Group Captain Peter Townsend, who was a war hero commissioned to serve in the royal household when George VI was king, she wholeheartedly gave her approval but the church and the parliament disapproved even though then Prime Minister Winston Churchill, personally approved of "a lovely young royal lady married to a gallant young airman." 

His cabinet refused to approve the marriage and the Archbishop of Canterbury did not approve of Margaret marrying a divorced man. The whole affair caused a constitutional crisis. 

The Queen stood her ground helping Margaret navigate the crisis, she planned to amend the 1772 Act making a royal marriage requiring the Queen's permission, allowing Margaret to marry Peter by removing her and any children from the marriage from the line of succession and thus the Queen's permission would no longer be necessary. 

"Her Majesty would not wish to stand in the way of her sister's happiness." she wrote in a letter on the subject to the Commonwealth Prime Ministers. 

In the end, Margaret and Peter decided not to marry and issued a statement citing the Church's teachings and duty to the Commonwealth as reasons. 

The Queen and her sister Princess Margaret were as thick as thieves growing up with their father and mother King George VI and Queen Elizabeth Bowes-Lyon, who wasn't born fellow royalty. They were just the Duke and Duchess of York then with two daughters, Elizabeth and Margaret. The close family lived in 145 Piccadilly rather than one of the royal palaces. They had pretty much settled down to a normal quiet family life.

However that was not to be, when the heir apparent to King George V, King Edward VIII, abdicated the throne to marry Wallis Simpson, a twice divorced American woman. Reluctantly Prince Albert (Bertie) accepted the throne to become King George VI. Bertie went to see his mother Queen Mary, told her what had just happened and cried his eyes out, sobbing like a child. 

From that day onwards, the sisters Elizabeth's and Margaret's lives took a big turn. They in turn became heirs apparent to the throne of the United Kingdom. 

George VI although a good king, never expected or wished to be King. Although he suffered from a speech impediment, he never lacked bravery or enterprise and he had a strong sense of duty. He fought in WW1 and he was the first member of the royal family to learn to fly. He became King in December 1936. Shortly afterwards, WW2 descended on Britain. The royal couple and their family rose to the occasion and held the nation together by staying at their posts all through the blitz and showed love and care for their people. In addition, they coped brilliantly with the aftermath of the abdication restoring faith in the monarchy.

The post war years saw Britain undergoing economic hardship and the King's health took a heavy toll. He had been a heavy smoker and had his lung removed in 1951. He died in his sleep in the winter of 1952.

Princess Elizabeth and Prince Phillip was on the tour of the Commonwealth on behalf of the King. She was on the first leg of the tour in Kenya when she received news of the King's death. She immediately returned to Britain as Queen Elizabeth II. 

So, as subjects of the Commonwealth and therefore the Crown, one can't help but feel the loss of recent days. The events that unfolded and the implications that were felt makes one want to contemplate the legacy that the late Queen has left behind. 

For starters, for those of us, Malaysians or otherwise who were brought up on the English tongue, know that we have been speaking and writing the Queen's English. And if the comprehension and expression of your English far surpasses your own native language, then your mother tongue is English. 

I have often wondered what language would I be fluent in, had the British not colonised Malaya then?

Would I still be able to enjoy the news, writings, books, literature, entertainment, civilisation, culture, fashion, food, politics, racism, imperialism, and so forth, the way a British subject would or would the outcome be totally different?

I don't yet have the answers to that question but I daresay I can see, with the passing of this woman, that she was not only Queen of the United Kingdom or the Commonwealth but the entire civilised world. To put it in the words exchanged between, the Queen and Princess Margaret after her coronation which was telecast live on television to a worldwide audience, Margaret said to Lilibeth; "You are the most popular person in the world". Lilibeth replied; " and you are the luckiest."

Her popularity was, unlike that of famous politicians, movie stars, celebrities or even Jesus.

On the eve of her coronation day, she made a radio broadcast to the Commonwealth in which she pledged her devotion to its people saying;

"Throughout all my life and with all my heart I shall strive to be worthy of your trust."

Coronations have been held at Westminster Abbey for 900 years and The Coronation of Queen Elizabeth II was to follow suit. Her coronation was set on 2 June 1953, only sixteen years earlier she had watched her father King George VI crowned in the elaborate ceremony in 1937. Hers was setting records of its own. It was the first ever to be televised in colour, it was watched by 27 million people and heard on the radio by 11 million people in the UK and over 200 million people around the world.

The Archbishop of Canterbury conducted the service, a duty undertaken since 1066. The coronation service include the Anointing of the sovereign with Anointing oils before god in an abbey. 

Therefore the Queen is installed as the monarch who is answerable to God. 

That is indeed a divine calling. No doubt when the crown was placed on her head, its weight was more than just a jewel-encrusted headgear. It came with the trust, the hopes and dreams of millions of people that the Queen will rule fairly and justly with dignity. 

Looking back at the 70 years of reign, she has delivered on the oath she took when she was anointed, crowned and installed as Queen at 25 years of age.

What a feat it was for any human being to achieve. It would seem that only a woman could have achieved that as it has just been proven that no man has ever done in the civilised world.

Although she had her fair share of challenges, governmental- mainly with the executive, the occasional family crisis including Princess Margaret, Princess Diana, and Prince Andrew. During her reign violence was central to the empire as exploitation of the colonies throughout the world brings into question whether the British Empire was a force of good or one of violent subjugation and exploitation? That is a story for another day. 

For now, I would like to mourn the passing of a remarkable woman who kept her promises, who said what she meant and meant what she said and in so doing, exalted womankind, inspired women and men around the globe. She carried out her divine work with her very potent 'soft' power. 

And to celebrate her life while bidding farewell to the end of the epoch of the Elizabethan age.

Thank you. Rest in Peace Ma'am.

P/S; Do you know The Queen's nickname?

I love you. Jon @31

 Knocking On Heaven's Door

That would be your anthem, among many of course. I chose this one because it reminds me of the mortality of the human form. The surety that as each of us is born we must each surely die. The best line thus far depicting and driving home this fact for me is encapsulated in this cheeky quote; “ do not get too serious with life, nobody gets out alive” So it is and was on that score( hmm.. I’m wondering if any great composer has a music score on that? Must check) that you, me and largely the conscious have come to live life. 

I still remember back when you and your band chose to sing this song, I was a little disturbed but gave it no further thought as I marked Guns & Roses under the genre of heavy metal and hard rock. They’re meant to be rebellious and provocative and I had little interest in them. 

However upon further introspection over time, this song holds much truth for living as much as it is about dying. We must come to terms with death before we can start living. 

Originally composed by Bob Dylan for the Sam Peckinpah movie- Pat Garret and Billy the Kid, this song is one of the greatest soundtracks of our lives. It has since been covered by many artists including Eric Clapton and GnR. Peckinpah also made the epic western- The Wild Bunch, that revised the entire western genre with innovative storytelling, and real depictions of violence in his interpretations. His characters are mostly loners and losers who desire to be honourable but are forced to compromise in a world of injustice and brutality. He inspired many filmmakers notably John Woo, who framed most of his shots inspired by Peckinpah, who pioneered the slow motion action sequences and Woo became iconic for using those techniques in his movies.

The song was written to the lyrics depicting the movie, there's nothing to it. 

Jon’s take was purely band and pop (rebel)culture driving the young of his time. It was after all 2004 and you were 14 and not much of a rebel. The oft repeated phrase keeps coming back in reprise. The rebuttal on my lips every time is;  aren’t we all, Knocking on Heaven’s door? Well you knocked and the door opened for you. You lucky bastard! Son of a Gan! I always see that cheeky grin of yours, it's a certain delightful knowing that it's all ok. 

I suppose at 31 you’d know by now that we don't ever really die. We live on in each other even after we die. 

Happy Birthday Son. It is all ok.

I love you. The Invitation #11.

Deep Sustenance.

"It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom

you have studied,

I want to know what sustains you,

from the inside,

when all else falls away."

"...When all we have relied upon has fallen away, there is nothing to do but wait without faith or hope. How we wait- whether we remain open or closed up- is the choice we have to make, a choice to either live or begin to spiral down toward death. To choose life we have to be willing to wait, open to life and love at a time when opening seems impossible and we are sure that no one and nothing will ever be able to find us."

          "What sustains us, when all else falls away are the things that make waiting and staying open to life             possible. I have been lucky to find three such things in my life- my practices of prayer and                          meditation, writing and spending time close to nature."

"The truth is, I only have to receive and give what I am able. There is no risk. The intimacy, the interconnectedness of all life, that is the love to which we all belong, can only be given and received. It cannot be taken. And when it is given and received, we are sustained."

 

~Oriah Mountain Dreamer

*In my own experience; When all has fallen away, I eventually realise that all that is left is the real me, devoid of names, titles, labels, and possessions. This is when I meet my true self and see if I really like the company I keep.