I love you. My Four Grandmothers

Jia Por, Gua Mah, Sar Mah, Ah Mah.
Covid19 Lockdown (D3)
*WonderWoman

Dress styles of Jia Por, mama's mother & Sar Mah, my third grandma.

Life has been so fine to me. Fineness comes in threes and fours. In addition to the three fine mothers and three major loves of my life, I very probably had four very fine old grandmothers.

I remember my first encounter with my first grandmother, I was 7 or 8, she was very old, wrinkled, a pallid square face, short and squat in stature, always dressed in dark traditional Hakka Chinese attire and bound feet.  Hair in a traditional bun, in her hand she clutches a big-sized palm fan constantly fanning herself daily. Jia Por was my mama's adopted "mother" therefore my grandmother. I could tell and feel she wasn't my own flesh and blood. All I can remember is that she stayed with us for a long while, months not years and she incessantly lectures and scolds us, mama included. I got so irritated by her scoldings that I planned and executed a devious trick on her!

She hates lizards of all sorts and I had a green scaly toy lizard.
One day after dinner, she was relaxing, fanning herself in the living room sitting on a low chair. I had planned to casually toss my toy lizard high up the ceiling into an arch that made the lizard land on my grandmother as though it fell from the ceiling.
I tell you I have never seen an old lady move that fast. She had the reflexes of a Chinese kung fu star.
I was laughing so hard she saw me and threatened to kill me! I was lucky she didn't have a heart attack. She did have one years later when she died in one of their sisters place in KL.
But she was sweet, my grandmother loved us in her own special way. She was the only grandma who I engaged with and had fond memories of. However painful or funny.

Typical Peranakan/Malay dress style.

I never got to engage or remember meeting my grandmother, my Papa's mother but I have embarked on a journey to find out more in the coming weeks and months.
I have recently come to realise and to terms that my grandmother was a Malay woman from a kampung in Simpang Ampat, Melaka. My grandfather a Chinaman from Fujian China made his fortune in Johol, Negeri Sembilan found and married this young Malay lady from Malacca.

Which makes my father, half Malay, half Chinese.

I don't recall ever calling for a family meeting to announce to my children; 
"Hey Guys, err I don't know if it matters to you but I think I may have something to tell you that you may not really know about? You know I probably told you or you probably figured out by now that we are Chinese. Right? We are Chinese? Actually not quite. So therefore I have to tell you that you're not a 100% Chinese. You're part Malay". I can't assume to imagine their reaction. And I can't wait to tell them in person.

So I don't remember my grandmother on my father's side. Except for the fact that she bore my grandfather many children as his first wife and took care of my father, her first son very well.
I had the privilege of meeting my third grandmother- my grandfather's third wife. A traditional Chinese lady with bound feet. She being the latest addition to the wives pool was also the youngest therefore outlived the others. She was smallish in stature, fair skinned with a quiet demeanour hobbled as she walked on her small bound feet.

But I do remember a few encounters with my step-mother's 'mak' who also happens to be my grandmother's younger sister. I remember hearing her only speak Malay whenever we visit with my Abu while she was still living in Simpang Ampat. Her health was deteriorating during my time so we didn't engage much. At least I got to see and speak to her and to be in her presence.
So I can only deduce that my paternal grandmother, our Matriarch only spoke Malay or maybe even Hokkien. Who know? I'm on the road to find out.

Stay tuned. Literally.